Worth Saving

My daughter was responsible for watering plants for one of my friends while the family was on vacation. Halfway through the week, Caitlin came home talking about a sick kitten near the barn. She was thin and weak, and her eyes were swollen. I looked Caitlin in the eyes and said, "No. You can't bring her home."

I grew up on a farm, and I cared for many animals, both pets and animals who weren't supposed to be pets but became my best buds. I don't have a steel heart, but...I tried to explain how some animals just don't make it and that we can't go to extremes to take care of every single animal and...my daughter wasn't buying it.

When have you felt a sacrifice was too much? You couldn't listen to that person's woes one more minute. You didn't have time to get help for the person stranded by the road. You didn't have enough to share.

The next morning I was getting ready to leave the house for a meeting, and Caitlin came home from watering. With the kitten. As she started to explain, I looked into her eyes and caught a glimpse of her heart. The kitten was worth saving.

If you refuse to take up your cross and follow me, you are not worthy of being mine. If you cling to your life, you will lose it; but if you give up your life for me, you will find it. - Matthew 10:38-39 (NLT).

After a trip to the vet's office and frequent trips to give her medicine, the kitten began to recuperate. She was still weak when our friends returned, but when Caitlin delivered the medicine to them, the kitten was receiving extra doses of pampering.

Some would argue that animals are different than people, and we don't have the same obligation to care and provide for them. That's perhaps another blog post. What struck me the most was my assumption of worthiness. What about you?

What is too much for you? Who is unreachable or unworthy of your efforts?

I am unworthy of Jesus...and yet he died on the cross for me. I'm thankful he doesn't extend the same judgment I often do. I hope he continues to change my perspective.

Are you allowing him to change you?

Above all, you must live as citizens of heaven, conducting yourselves in a manner worthy of the Good News about Christ. Then, whether I come and see you again or only hear about you, I will know that you are standing together with one spirit and one purpose, fighting together for the faith, which is the Good News. - Philippians 1:27 (NLT)

19 Things I've Learned During 19 Years of Marriage

1. Our backgrounds, experiences, and personalities lead us to react to each other and situations in different ways. And that's okay. Our differences make our marriage better.
2. Men are different from women in not only the obvious by also many subtle ways. When I assume my husband needs and wants what I need and want, we both get frustrated.
3. Honesty, no matter how difficult at the time, is the only option when facing a situation that might divide our relationship.
4. When one of us is weak in an area, the other one "taking over" isn't the best option. Complementing each other means coming together where we are and walking together toward a common goal.
5. Dream together. Not "if only we could" dreams that breed discontent but a vision of where we want to go and grow together in our lives.
6. Competition can be fun but it has no place in our roles in marriage: who does what and contributes what. Replace competition with encouragement.
7. Say "I was wrong. You're right." as often as possible.
8. Express your love and respect for your spouse as often and in as many ways as possible. Say it. Do it.
9. Build each other up outside of your marriage...in front of your children, spouse's family, coworkers, etc.
10. Don't pack your bags. Avoid baggage by not packing any! Choose to face your spouse and resolve an issue or leave it behind. Packing it for later use only gives you a sore back and cranky spirit.
11. Develop a multi-faceted realtionship. Be friends, lovers, co-parents.
12. Foster healthy relationships outside marriage. Women need to hang out and do "girl" stuff." Men need to hang out and do "guy stuff."
13. Don't assume. We can't read each other's minds and no matter how sure we are of our spouse's motivation, it's always better to ask instead of assume.
14. Expect changes. You've (hopefully) grown in the last several years. You'll continue to grow and change. So will your spouse.
15. Take time for each other. Every day.
16. Clean up each other's messes. Big stuff and little stuff.
17. Take responsibility. Don't blame your parents, kids, work, etc. Grow up and own up.
18. Remember it's not about us. We made a commitment to both ourselves and God. To break one shatters the other.
19. Have hope. When times are tough, hope for better. When times are good, hope for better. I look forward to the next 19 years!

I WIN!

I enjoy watching people. While at Panera recently, I saw many individuals and groups of people come and go. But one small boy stands out. In fact, I would have had to try very hard not to notice him.

He was three or four years old and arrived with his grandma, who met a friend. The boy sat on the inside of the booth while his grandma and friend chatted. The two women rarely took a break, even as the boy did his best to disrupt them. He asks questions, told stories and peered into the next booth. He walked and bounced on the seat and chatted with the with people waiting for their food. His grandma seemed to have an eye on the side of her head; although she rarely stopped looking at and talking with her friend, she constantly reached over to subdue the boy.

Finally, she gave him the warning: "We're leaving soon, so you need to get ready." Get ready? This boy had been blocked in this booth for way too long already. Oh, he was definitely ready. The problem was, grandma wasn't. The boy and his grandma didn't have the same interpretation of leaving soon. So he stepped it up a notch. He talked incessantly of what he was going to do when he got to grandma's house. And his voice got louder and louder. He leaned toward her and spoke directly into her ear and repeated "Graaandmaaaaa!"

When have you walked in place or bounced up and down in impatience? When have you repeated the same thing over and over, believing more words or louder speech would get someone's attention? How does this boy's behavior remind you of your prayer life?

After several minutes of the boy's constant and increasingly louder demands for his grandma's attention, the grandma peeled her eyes away from her friend, looked her grandson in the eye (frankly, I think he was startled to find her looking directly at him), and firmly said, "We're leaving now."

The boy raised his hands high above his head and yelled, "Yeah, I wwiiiiinnnnnn!"

I wonder how many times God has given me what I wanted simply based on my persistence. Was it his will anyway? Perhaps. His timing? Likely not or he would have chosen another time to answer and not rewarded my incessant demands and childish behavior.

When do you raise your hands high above your head and yell, "Yeah, I wwiiiinnnnn!"? When you get your way...or when God gets his?

All athletes are disciplined in their training. They do it to win a prize that will fade away, but we do it for an eternal prize. So I run with purpose in every step. I am not just shadowboxing. - 1 Corinthians 9: 25-26 (NLT)

Missed a Spot

I drive a van. Not the most stylish way to travel, but I've learned to enjoy it. I like to take care of the vehicles I drive, so I regularly wash and wax my van, keep the inside cleaned, and have the oil changed (something I haven't learned to do, nor do I have the desire to learn).

The first time I waxed the van, I met a new challenge. I'd never had such a tall vehicle. Usually, I could open a door, stand on the floorboard and reach the middle of the roof. Not with the van. I wasn't even close. I even tried standing on the seats, but I could only reach portions of the roof...and risked the probability of falling over backward. I don't mind risk, but it was easy to rationalize the risk was too great, so I decided to skip the roof. After all, who would see it?

I started waxing the rest of the van, but I kept thinking about the roof. Drat the inconvenient times God speaks to me. I could have been content to just shine what I could see...but he reminded me that's not the way he does things.

Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a loyal spirit within me. - Psalm 51:10 (NLT)

He doesn't leave dirty spots. He doesn't ignore the places hidden from view; those are exactly the most important ones to get and keep clean! It doesn't matter whether or not I see the top of my van. It's exposed to rain and sun more than any other area of my vehicle, so it's the last area I should ignore! I was convicted. I fetched a ladder.

What in your life... thoughts, responsibilities, interests... are slightly out of reach yet need extra protection? God's already aware, and he's willing and able to clean it all.

...So, today I started with the top. I've decided it's a spiritual discipline for me, a reminder I need to place everything in my life under his cleansing and protection. I was pretty proud of myself as I balanced on my ladder. And then I started on the lower panels. The car wash had not completely removed the summer road grime. Ugh. What would it hurt to wax over a little streak here and there?

But if we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all wickedness. - 1 John 1:9

How have you glossed over your imperfections? How did it work for you?

It never works well for me. Convicted again. Yes, it took me longer to wax the van, but I'm sure it was worth it. And I'll let you know next time I plan to wax the van, because I'm sure God will continue to teach me!

If you keep yourself pure, you will be a special utensil for honorable use. Your life will be clean, and you will be ready for the Master to use you for every good work. - 2 Timothy 2:21

Super-Sized Discontent

According to cnn.com, size 14 is the new 10 (http://tinyurl.com/kv2vhc). The article reports clothing lines have gradually resized clothing to help us feel better about ourselves. So a woman who wears a true size 14 (whatever that is!) can take home size 10 clothes and feel good. If we feel better about ourselves as we're shopping, we'll likely buy more, right? (see Size Matters, http://tinyurl.com/kjvudx)

When we go out to eat, we want the choice to super size our meals. Seriously, how often do we need our meal super-sized? When my friend Wendy visited from Australia last year, she and her daughter were taken aback by serving portions here in the U.S. They soon adjusted to requesting appetizers instead of entrees.

In today's economy, wouldn't we be better off to minimize portions and lower our meal costs? Our wallets would be a little fatter, and our waistlines a little thinner. We'd go into a restaurant (or open the refrigerator) and get what we need. And we'd go into a clothing store and get what fits.

This isn't an issue of clothing size or serving portions or economics. It's about self-centeredness. We want the control to choose what we eat, how much we eat, what we wear, and even how we feel about ourselves. We super size our meals and deny our super-sizes. We think choices will bring us content...but the fallout of our choices breeds discontent.

What are you discontent with? Be real with yourself. Employment? Weight? Relationships? Past? Finances?

Now it's time for a reality check. Who is responsible for your discontentedness?

Study the following verses and listen to God.

Don’t point your finger at someone else and try to pass the blame! - Hosea 4:4

This is what the Lord says:“Cursed are those who put their trust in mere humans, who rely on human strength and turn their hearts away from the Lord. - Jeremiah 17:5

I no longer count on my own righteousness through obeying the law; rather, I become righteous through faith in Christ. For God’s way of making us right with himself depends on faith. - Philippians 3:9

Is God changing your perspective?

Not that I was ever in need, for I have learned how to be content with whatever I have. I know how to live on almost nothing or with everything. I have learned the secret of living in every situation, whether it is with a full stomach or empty, with plenty or little. - Philippians 4:11-12 (NLT)

Free to Be Me

It's Independence Day. Not a day I typically get ultra-excited about. Not that I don't think it's important. I'm honored to live in the United States of America. I say thanks to servicemen and women whenever I get the chance. I respect the flag. I appreciate this country's history. I appreciate the freedom I have.

Or do I?

I had a busy week, but God prompted me to pause occasionally to remind me of the freedoms I have...and often take for granted.

• I drove from Illinois to Kentucky to Missouri. I didn't worry about my security. I stopped when I wanted to get a drink. I chose where to buy gasoline. I talked to whom I wanted.


• I ate when I wanted, where I wanted. One day I walked into a restaurant and asked to see the menu before I decided. I chose to eat there with two of my girlfriends...and what a great choice it was!


• I walked through a convention center for several days, chatting with such a wide variety of people about different topics: family, ministry, government, travel.

That's my sticky note version. Make a list of your own. Think about today. What have you been free to do today?

Do you consider your everyday freedoms as "rights" or "privileges"? I'd certainly like to say privileges...but I'd be lying. I make choices every day that I treat more like a right than a privilege. I should be able to access the internet. I should be able to shop where and when I want. I should be able to talk about whatever I want with family and friends. I should be able to worship where, how, and when I want.

When I consider my choices as rights instead of privileges, it all becomes about me. And it's not about me at all. With freedom comes requirements and responsibilities. Not selfishness.

Sin is no longer your master, for you no longer live under the requirements of the law. Instead, you live under the freedom of God’s grace. - Romans 6:14 (NLT)

Sure, I'm free to be me...the me God created me to be.

For you have been called to live in freedom, my brothers and sisters. But don’t use your freedom to satisfy your sinful nature. Instead, use your freedom to serve one another in love. - Galatians 5:13 (NLT)

God gave you freedom. How does your life reflect it?